Fear

My fear has finally arrived. I knew that this would happen sooner or later, and yea, sure it does. To be frank, i come from a rather uneducated family but i am not embarrassed of that. It is not as if in your family you are going to talk about what is the most efficient way of boiling water based on kinectic particle theory, or calculate the most money-saving way of using electricity. What i am worried about is not the communication among family members of different education level, its rather about the way we think.
When i was young, other than making mistakes because i act much faster than i speak, i had never, and i really mean NEVER, gone into any conflict with my parents. i would just be unhappy over them not allowing me to eat chocolates or asking me to do my penmanship. But that is not considered a conflict, isn't it? However, as i get more literate and start to like know more about the world, my views starts to differ from theirs. Whenever i hear them complain about the governments' policies, i would somehow start debating with them over the positive points of the policies. Whenever i do that, we start to quarrel. This situation worsened when last year, when i have to take social studies and geography. I start to gain more knowledge about what was exactly happening in the world and why are different policies implemented. From then on, MORE CONFLICTS. It seemed as though i can no longer agree with them. It not only the more political issues anymore, its like, everything. I have no idea what im actually thinking. Whatever they say, i just feel the urge to rebuke. And when i mean rebuke, i mean debating like some kinda lawyer. I would not give in unless i feel that i am on the winning end, childish yea? i think so oo, but i just can't help it. I hate to do that. But anyways, back to it, yea, one example is like recently, my mum is complaining that her boss refuses to give her any off-days, especially when national day falls on a thursday, which is supposedly her off-day. She starts complaining about it and im like "its good what, u get double pay lei". And that was the spark... She now insists that i only care about money and neglect how fatigue she is. I really don't understand her way of thinking anymore man!
1) She only works half a day even if she works on a public holiday, she is not deprived from resting in the afternoon! You do the same amount of work and you get twice the [ay, u do the math, this is clearly a great deal!
2) I merely said 'good what, got double pay', how is that neglecting her health and everything? I believe most of the adults out there work for the sole reason of supporting the family. Since the aim of working is to bring home the bacon, isn't it good to have an extra day's pay? I am merely being happy for you over the profit and u claimed that i am being a heartless girl?! No link ?!
3) She complains to my father about the matter too. So, being a male chauvinist, he believes that he has the duty of resolving her problems, suggests some possible solutions and all she said was "cannot de" , "impposible", "ya right, not as if it will work". Omg, then what do you want. My father comes home from work and is bombarded countless rejections when he has not even taken his bath? I admire his tolerance and patience man, seriously, i salute him for that. How can he be tired and yet patient at the same time? i don't get it...
But oh wells, thats what couples are for right? "...in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live." what a sweet vow *envy* At least they are always there for each other, but what about me? What if one day the gaps between us gets larger and larger till an extent with i can never harmonise with their views anymore? what will happen? am i going to be left deserted on my own patch of torn land with no one else by my side? i wonder...